Parenting styles have often adapted throughout generations and have shaped their children into certain behaviors that they exhibit during adulthood.

What was once the debate between free-range parenting versus strict systems that parents set up that kept their kids “in check”, has now met in the middle, which people think makes children more socially audacious.

Gentle parenting is this newfound form of parenting that relies on empathy to raise fully independent children by setting healthy boundaries and respect for one another.

Rather than going for a more punishment or reward tactic, gentle parenting focuses on coaching your children through mistakes to improve their self-awareness and understanding of their actions.

This had gained a lot of popularity among parents as some parents started to comment critiques on normal parent behaviors like yelling. Some have claimed that installing fear into your children isn’t healthy and leaves a negative relationship between child and parent that might promote the child to produce that same bad behavior again.

Instead, approaching the situation calmly exhibits respect for how your child feels in that moment, letting them process their emotions more efficiently and holding themselves accountable to turn that behavior around.

But parents need to keep in mind that not every style works for every kid. Now I may not be a mother or know what it’s like to parent a child, but one thing I can say with sort of being a “second mom” to my two siblings is that gentle parenting doesn’t always work.

Yes, while I think all parents shouldn’t see themselves as someone their child should fear, but have empathy and respect for and vice versa, there are certain terms that being “gentle” isn’t the absolute answer.

Some of the mere examples I have seen are that some parents are too gentle to the point where their kids are walking all over them. How are children supposed to learn about setting healthy boundaries if you can’t install rules that showcase healthy habits?

Letting a child do whatever they want doesn’t teach them respect, they get accustomed to getting what they want and that behavior will not only hurt them in the long run but sets them up for self-destruction as adults.

This is what makes them develop certain nasty, rude, and maniacal traits which doesn’t help anybody and just sets the path for even bigger issues.

Nowadays, social media is a big part of life and I think some parents care so much about others’ opinions of them that they will conform to an idea that they don’t even agree with to avoid any backlash.

But it’s okay to say no. A child doesn’t need screen time all the time and they don’t need popsicles before dinner. Instead of just giving a child what they want to prevent a temper tantrum, it’s easier to apply rules so that they can adjust. 

Without rules, how would they learn to adapt to environments like school, where rules are heavily in place for a multitude of reasons?

This goes without saying, gentle parenting only works for gentle kids. At the same time, if a child has learned to adopt habits that exemplify respect for others around them then yes, subbing out the constant establishment of rules with a gentler approach seems reasonable.

As the generation who will raise the future, it’s important to see the pros and cons of wanting to be your child’s friend versus actually being a parent. Knowing a great balance can only set a path to success without hoping for unrealistic expectations.