For a long time, growing up felt like something far-flung—an idea tied to a newfound freedom, independence, and finally becoming someone new. But, somewhere in February, that idea began to alter.
The moments that once felt so uncomfortable for me—walking into Orchestra completely lost, struggling with my math classes, or dealing with people who made high school harder than it needed to be—began to stand out differently. Instead of memories, they started to become proof of how much can change when choosing to stay instead of walk away.
I struggled heavily my freshman year, lost in where exactly I felt like I could fit in. The loss of friends from middle school left me alone, timid, and rather confused on who I should be around as I uncomfortably sat in class, looking around at anyone else who was also adrift.
Yet with that loss of security, I also met people who made my life so much better in a time where I felt like I had lost everything I knew about myself. With that loss of community, I found one that made me feel even more thrilled to call myself a part of. My section in orchestra welcomed me with both warmth and acceptance—along with several of my classmates in mostly P.E and Math I that stayed by my side through tough assignments.
At a time when I felt so unsure about myself, even the smallest words of encouragement stayed in my mind. My section leader in Orchestra, Alek, told me, “I’m always so so grateful for you, you came to the basses and stayed.” Something that has stuck with me, even now as I prepare to graduate.
However, as fun as those nostalgic moments were, they also drifted past me. Many of my friends in Orchestra graduated, my friends in my classes had completely different classes from mine in the new year. And while that came with change, a new year came with new friends. This cycle started over and over again as the friends I stayed close to throughout all those years stayed close to little.
Conversely, losing people along this path doesn’t necessarily mean something went haywire—it often just means their place in your life was never meant to be permanent. Some relationships fade quietly, while others end in ways that are difficult to comprehend. Each one leaves something behind them. The people who supported me helped me shape so much more confidence in myself while others who didn’t made it clearer just what type of energy I wanted to surround myself with.
In a way though, even these negative experiences became a form of direction, showing not only who I didn’t want to be like, but who I was becoming too.
Growing up has meant realizing that the people I surround myself with matter more than I once throughout, they influence the way I act, think, and see myself. And because of that, it’s important to stay close to those who you’d want to become like in the future.
Turning eighteen doesn’t come with a party as much as a realization that something is coming to an end. Youth doesn’t vanish all at once. The same routines that I had once grown so accustomed to began to fade, the moments that once felt trivial started to slowly carry a quiet weight to them.
Yet, with that also comes a calming peace. The right people around you begin to fall into place. The drama that once felt like it had taken control of your whole life starts to lose its importance. And the pressure to follow your career falls silently in line.
When asked what small thing she learned to appreciate more this year, Ghada Hassan answered, “I learned to appreciate every little moment because life goes quickly. My family, friends, and teachers felt so much more crucial in my life than ever before.”
Additionally, When asked what they would tell her junior-year self, an anonymous Senior said “Don’t give your friends a second chance, sometimes it’s better to let go.”
Yes. There are many other countless stories about seniors talking about how they grew to overcome their struggles—having these perfect grades and perfect friends but the truth is, for many, that just isn’t a reality. Some things stay unresolved. There are moments of being buried in expectations, emotions, and responsibilities that simply don’t disappear with time.
Nonetheless, growth isn’t always one to be found in the aspect of everything working out, but rather, continuing forward despite the uncertainties. What truly matters isn’t whether every problem is solved, but the decision to keep going anyways.
As people, we will always struggle in some sort of aspect, whether it can be socially, educationally, or their own self image. By putting these standards on ourselves by aiming to overcome all of our struggles, often, we will remain disappointed by all the things that weren’t accomplished during our high school years.
However, it’s important to push past these expectations. There may not be a friend group you make during your high school years nor the grades you may want. However, that doesn’t make someone any less than they are.